Awake
...because lying around hoping to lose consciousness is my idea of a good time
Nothing
Couldn't think of anything worse.
Guh.
Guh.
*sigh*
Well thanks, Will Smith.
How very eloquent.
How very eloquent.
And I Was Gay
I remember it like it was yesterday. All those years ago... on that fateful night.
It was a night like no other. The stars were gently caressing the skies in a melodramatic fashion. The moon lit up the surface of the earth like a vampire's kiss.
That's the night when I met Edward Cullen. He said 'Hello' and I was gay.
Since then I've dreamt about him. There were three things that I knew for sure: One, Edward was a vampire. Two, during summer men never wear trousers while indoors. And three, I was irrevocably and unconditionally in love with him. Edward, that is, not the guy not wearing trousers.
The no pants-look had covered the face of the planet like a wildfire. Men everywhere were stripping down to their grundies for no reason at all. Never before had so many women been so very un-horny en masse. Their children started crying constantly.
28 Days later...
96% of the world's population was decimated by the outbreak of men in the underpants. There was only one woman left on the face of the planet. Her name was Isabella Swan. She wasn't homosexual, nor was she a vampire. However, she had three knockers and a nose where her ass ought to be.
This woman was the only hope for the continuation of mankind.
If someone should read this blog entry, let them know this: The square root of röms is 5. Yeah. And there are hot asian chicks. They'll do what you want. Yeah. Me big American man. My point being that I'm a bully and not a nerd. Where was I?
*lots of farts*
*someone puking*
Oh, in the kitchen, Meg?
Well, if I'm a child Lois, do you know what that makes you? A pedophile. And I'll be damned if I'm going to stand here and be lectured by a pervert.
The real artist is a homosexual mailman by the name of Andreas Rahim. He's of European-Asian-Indian-Pakistani descent. His skin is white and black. He was conceived during an interracial foursome, which explains the ethnicity. He's a miracle boy. He has the ability to be so lame that no one will ever like him, ever.
Good night, and good luck.
/Will Smith
It was a night like no other. The stars were gently caressing the skies in a melodramatic fashion. The moon lit up the surface of the earth like a vampire's kiss.
That's the night when I met Edward Cullen. He said 'Hello' and I was gay.
Since then I've dreamt about him. There were three things that I knew for sure: One, Edward was a vampire. Two, during summer men never wear trousers while indoors. And three, I was irrevocably and unconditionally in love with him. Edward, that is, not the guy not wearing trousers.
The no pants-look had covered the face of the planet like a wildfire. Men everywhere were stripping down to their grundies for no reason at all. Never before had so many women been so very un-horny en masse. Their children started crying constantly.
28 Days later...
96% of the world's population was decimated by the outbreak of men in the underpants. There was only one woman left on the face of the planet. Her name was Isabella Swan. She wasn't homosexual, nor was she a vampire. However, she had three knockers and a nose where her ass ought to be.
This woman was the only hope for the continuation of mankind.
If someone should read this blog entry, let them know this: The square root of röms is 5. Yeah. And there are hot asian chicks. They'll do what you want. Yeah. Me big American man. My point being that I'm a bully and not a nerd. Where was I?
*lots of farts*
*someone puking*
Oh, in the kitchen, Meg?
Well, if I'm a child Lois, do you know what that makes you? A pedophile. And I'll be damned if I'm going to stand here and be lectured by a pervert.
The real artist is a homosexual mailman by the name of Andreas Rahim. He's of European-Asian-Indian-Pakistani descent. His skin is white and black. He was conceived during an interracial foursome, which explains the ethnicity. He's a miracle boy. He has the ability to be so lame that no one will ever like him, ever.
Good night, and good luck.
/Will Smith